Austin's Dog

She was Austin's dog.  From the beginning I made sure to remind him of that too.  Every time she dug a hole in the yard, I reminded him.  Every time she figured  out how to open the pet gates and destroy something in the house, I reminded him.  Every time she figured out how to open our "latest and greatest" contraption to keep her in the yard, I reminded him. Every time I had to go out looking for her because she didn't find her way home, I reminded him.

On Monday, when we had to say goodbye to her, I reminded him. I reminded him what a pain in the ass it was to clean up all the scratch  marks on the couches when he would sneak her under the covers to cuddle with her while he watched a movie.   I reminded him of how rude she was to save her food until Hannah (our other dog) was done eating, and then made sure to eat every bite right in front of her, while looking at Hannah to make sure she was watching.

Today, she reminded me.  She reminded me as I mopped her muddy paw prints from my kitchen floor for the very last time.   She reminded me as I mowed the lawn and stepped in her shit for the very last time.  She reminded me when I saw her uneaten rawhide bone on the grass. She reminded me that she would wait for Hannah to chew her bone until it was nice and soft and then snatch it away from her and reap all the benefits.  She reminded me that she was very much my dog, as much as I wanted to deny it.  Mylie, you will and are so very missed.

My children's father

Many years ago I was sitting in Biology class and a tall, lanky, boy sat behind me.  He always made sure to tell me "please" and "thank you" whenever I passed a paper back to him.  Little did I know, that my sophomore year in high school I would have met my lifelong partner.  Even littler did I know what an amazing father this awkward boy would be to our kids, many years later.

As I watched my husband in church today, I realized what an incredibly different relationship he has with our kids that I do.  Our son crawled into his lap every opportunity he got, and Austin quietly played "thumb wars" with him while listening to the sermon intently.  I started thinking about how our children beg for him to tuck them in each night because he tells the best stories, and how they love getting to "clean up" with him while playing "shark water."  As I watch Brady and him now, playing video games, I am overwhelmed with joy and thankfulness that God has brought this man into our lives.

Austin, you impress me every day with your imagination and creativity with these children.  I see it every day and I saw it even more this past week with Jack staying with us for the week.  Thank you for being you.... because you are amazing.

Running for Rochelle

If any of you were paying any attention to me the last.... 6 months... you'll know I've started running... A lot.  I technically can't say I've never been a runner, but since its been over 10 years, I feel like this is a new thing for me.  Tomorrow, I will be running in my first half-marathon.  Many people ask me, "why?" So, I thought I would tell you about Ro.

Rochelle was my roommate in college.  There were actually 8 of us, but who's counting?  Anyway, Ro was always the most positive, level headed, athlete, and loving person anyone had ever met.  Nobody could meet Ro and not like her.  She is just that kind of person.

After college she married her college sweetheart, did the accelerated nursing program, and has since popped out some pretty adorable red head curly haired little girls.  I joke around and used to say I "copy" Ro... She did the accelerated nursing program at Creighton, then I did.  She got married, then I did.  Not only did I get married though, I actually had the exact same wedding dress.  (Though I did not know it at the time of purchase!). She became a orthopedic nurse, so did I.  She popped out some shorties, so did I.  

Then, one night, a little over a year ago she called me with some devastating news, her mom was dying.  Her mother who I had met too many times to count, who was there for almost every single volleyball or track meet, the mother who was so positive, supportive, and present in Rochelle's life.  My heart broke for her.

A month later, she had passed away.

A couple months after that, she called me with more devastating news.  Ro had been diagnosed with Lymphoma and would start chemo almost immediately.  The lymphoma was only found due to her mothers direction, before passing, to insist on tests to test for cancer at a young age, since she had been terminal from it.  

I didn't know what to do.  I prayed and I prayed and I prayed.  Then Ro told me she was going to run a half marathon this fall and had started training... And was going to keep working full time as a nurse, plus be at home with her kids and husband.  She was amazing.  I, obviously didn't believe her.  There was no way she would be able to train for a half-marathon, carry out a normal life, especially while doing chemo.  

When a friend called me the very next day and told me she was too training for a half-marathon and needed a partner,I knew what I had to do.  I started training.  I needed to complete this half-marathon, though I couldn't even run more than 3 minutes at the time, because I knew Rochelle wouldn't be able to.  I knew I had to run for Ro.

The funny thing is, Ro is a fighter. She took all that negativity from the cancer and put it right into her running.  In September she finished that half-marathon, averaging 2 minutes faster per mile than I run on a "short" day. 

Tomorrow, when I am running my first half marathon, I will be thinking of Ro the entire time.  When I want to stop and just say, "screw it," I will remember what I fighter Rochelle is.

This one's for you, Ro.

Sequoia

 

Whenever you move, it's always an emotional time.  It's like saying goodbye to a person you once were, and not quite knowing what lies ahead for you....  From that point on, everyone new you meet, will never know that side of you... yes, I know a house is just a house, but then again, a house is not just a house.

I believe my parents moved into this house about 15 years ago.....  Right before my senior year of high school.  Let me tell you, I came here kicking and screaming.  I have too many vivid memories of horrible things I have said to my parents that year.... it was definitely a tough one.  However, it must not have been too tough on me, since a few years after I finished college my husband & I moved back. 

You don't really realize how much you'll miss a place, until you know your about to the point you can't turn back.  This is the place we called "home" when Brady was just 3 1/2 months old.  This is the place where he took his first steps.  Where my sister was right beside me to witness it as well.  This is the home that still has fingerprints on the big glass mirror in the dining room because I couldn't bear to wash off the cute prints of my baby boy looking at his reflection, and getting that huge, open mouthed, "Brady" smile.  This is the house that quickly became less "grown up" and more "you-better-watch-where-your-walking-or-you-will-break-your-ankle-on-a-train", with toys from the bathroom to the bedroom, to under the covers.  This is the house where my son formed such a special bond with his 9-hour-elder cousin.

This is the house that made it possible for us to even think about adding another member to our family with God's will.  This is the house that let us have Lola while being a one income household while Austin was in school.  This is the house that she had her first smile, roll, crawl, and walk.  When my parents heard she was walking, they were here 30 seconds later to witness it themselves.  This is the house where we have continued to learn about God's love, and how blessed we've all been to share such wonderful memories under one roof (or technically, two roofs).

This is the house that is missing a bathtub.  This is the house that allowed us to go "next door" to the neighbors house every other night to use the bathtub, and visit with Grandma & Papa.  This is the house where everyone congregated on Sunday nights for whatever gourmet meal my father had made that night.  This is the house where we "burn" in the backyard......paper, cardboard, or even just firewood while smoking a cigar.  This is the house where the pool was always open and inviting, and where the kids first learned to swim.  This is the house with the backyard where Brady & I have gone on countless "adventures".  This is the yard that Papa mows while having Brady right beside him on his "tractor."  This is the house of Easter egg hunts, birthdays, first bike rides and law school graduation.  This is the house where my parents have given us countless lessons on how to love one another, unconditionally. 

This is just a house, just a house that will be missed tremendously.